While out and about the other day, I noticed an older couple walking down the street holding hands. He was helping her stay steady on her feet and she was looking up at him as they waited to cross the street. Aw, I thought to myself That’s what I want. And then I took a pause.

I don’t know this couple. I don’t know whether they have been together for fifty years, or whether they just started dating. I mean my grandmother got remarried in her eighties, so I know it happens. And then I considered the fact, that this notion that “growing old together” is that relationship goal, but is not necessarily realistic at the same time. Some couples who have been together for fifty years are unhappy, and some are not. Some people find love later in life and some do not. And some people unfortunately don’t have the chance to grow old together, for a variety of reasons. I realized when I looked at this couple, it wasn’t about that. It wasn’t that they were old (and cute as hell) but rather it was the way that she was looking up at him. She was glancing up at him with love in her eyes, that me, the observer, could see from inside my car. That was what took me for a moment, and why I noticed them.

And then I realized that how they looked at each other was what I want.

I want someone who loves me whole heartedly, with no conditions, regardless of how long we are together or what is happening in our lives.

I want someone that can joke around with me and do silly and fun things that keep us young, light and enjoying the small moments. That isn’t embarrassed to sing in public or joke around in the grocery store or show affection just because they feel like it.

I want someone who gives to the relationship and on the days that I can’t do things, like clean my bathroom, he will come over and do it for me. No expectation, no holding it against me later, but just helping out for the sake of helping out. To let me know that he cares.

I want someone who can make me blush and smile to myself when he compliments my outfit or says good morning beautiful. Who makes me giggle in a way that feels foreign to me but warm and fuzzy at the same time. Someone who my friends tell me makes me act like a teenage girl.

I want someone who my friends are in love with too. Someone who treats me in a way that is not only different than any man before, but also that makes those around me notice and tell me I am lucky to have. A men who is considerate and insightful and understanding while I continue to grow and develop into the woman I want to be.

I want someone who I can have honest conversations with, tell the truth to, without worrying about hurting their feelings or that it will be brought up later. I want someone who will be just as brutally honest in return so that we always will know where we stand with each other. Someone who will tell me the truth even if it is hurtful rather than lying to placate me.

I want someone who finds me attractive, makes me feel sexy and puts effort into creating quality time, intimacy and pleasure. Who takes value in physical touch whether its as simple as a hand on my knee as we watch a movie together.

I want someone who is wanting and willing to grow into a better person. Someone who is working on balancing their hopes and dreams with mine without taking away from each other or the things we want in our lives. Someone who is comfortable with having separate parts of our lives while growing our life together at the same time.

I want someone who other people think that he is too good to be true. That they tell us that we are in the honeymoon phase and it will eventually fade. I want someone who proves them wrong. Someone who continues to love me in the same and consistent way and who people think we are newly dating, even when it is years later. Who see the love in the our faces, like I did the other day with that old couple.

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And then I caught myself.

I already have that, I considered, I have someone who looks at me like that, smiling to myself as I drove away.

And for that I can’t be anything but grateful.